- by Eva Chuc, RVC Fellow, Cohort 4
When we hear the word challenge, what is the first thought that comes to mind? Is it the idea of competing against something or someone or to prove a point? Or are we able to shift this perspective in a way where challenges are embraced, and the outcome is we are transformed from the person we were before? In this, I want to share with you my relationship to challenges and how it continues to transform me. In turn, I hope this will also challenge you to embrace challenges.
My perception of challenge was very much how some might generalize it. It was competing or being compared to in order to grow and be better than the other person. I was challenged by the people closest to me to do better and be better. It was done in a way that, despite my best efforts, was not enough for them. This led me to avoid challenges well into the beginning of my adult life. I would avoid them at all costs and stick with what I knew and what I was good at and comfortable with.
One challenge that I continue to work through is my relationship with conflict. As a child growing up, I struggled with having difficult conversations when conflict arose. I stayed silent when I knew something was wrong, or I saw someone being mistreated. I didn’t know what to do or what to say. This was a quality taught to me at a younger age. If it had nothing to do with me, I was supposed to keep quiet and pretend I did not see anything. As I grew older and began to think more for myself, I felt an inner struggle. I had a strong desire to speak up when I saw conflict happening, but there was a stronger silence that held me back. It felt uneasy, and I wasn’t sure what to do. I had to figure out what the risk would be if I stepped in and think about the expectations I had for myself. This started changing when I realized I wanted to give back and work in my community.
When I began working at The Good Foot Arts Collective and in the nonprofit sector, I was surrounded by people open to sharing their struggles and their processes. This shook my world because I was told growing up, I had to keep my worries and difficulties to myself. Hearing others share about the challenges they had or were going through allowed me to open up slowly. I had difficulty being transparent because I was nervous about what others would think of me, but I also knew I was in a safe space to be honest.
“Challenges no longer meant my worth was threatened or I had to prove myself. It had become an ask for reflection and to take action on who I am, my values, and my beliefs.”
Honesty and vulnerability are some values that we all agree to hold at Good Foot. If we do not have difficult conversations, how can we expect others to? One instance was participating in an anti-racist workshop, and it still reverberates in me now. There was a section in the day where we all sat down and discussed “Undoing Internalized Racial Oppression.” On the large post-it were actions and beliefs I saw growing up and unintentionally perpetuating. At that moment, I was challenged to think about what this meant for me and the work I was doing with the youth in the community. I could not stay the same for the sake of the people that I love and care about. What steps did I need to take to change, and what actions would reflect my values?
Nothing was going to change until I took a step to ask for support and have conversations with those around me. I asked questions, engaged in difficult conversations, and leaned into accountability from my community because I wanted to see transformation happen.
We are meant to be challenged in order to grow. I believe it is a natural process that we all go through. We do not have to be alone. I am so blessed to be surrounded by thought partners and people I call family who are unafraid to take action that aligns with their values. Seeing this firsthand gave me the courage to take steps that aligned with who I am and who I want to be.
At this point in my life, challenge and change had become synonymous in my mind. Challenges no longer meant my worth was threatened or I had to prove myself. It had become an ask for reflection and to take action on who I am, my values, and my beliefs. A gentle reminder for myself and for those around me is to surround yourself with those who will be by your side during difficult moments and to ask yourself how you will allow challenges to transform you.